Put Your Blinders On

Last week I talked about wearing your blinders when focusing on a goal. I thought I’d take it a step further this week… Do you make decisions based on the people around you?  DeeP dOwN did you decide to buy a new car because all your friends and family recently upgraded theirs?  Did you put your kid in t-ball because you felt the pressure from the other parents?  Have you recently felt the need to go on an extreme diet because you bumped into an old classmate that lost a bunch of weight? Whether it is what you buy, the vocation you choose, how you raise your kids, or the way you live your life, we must ask ourselves this question: If I couldn’t see others and what they are doing, would I still be making the same decisions? 

So many times we forget to think on our own because we are heavily influenced by other people.  Doug (my husband) and I talk about this a lot.  In our decison making we have to constantly remind ourselves that, if we didn’t care what others thought, would we still go down the same path? It is in these situations it is important to know yourself. Take buying a home for example.  Would you have purchased your home if you didn’t know what type of home everyone else lived in? Without thinking about it, you went house hunting feeling obligated to want certain things because you knew what other people have.  Even though they weren’t there, the influence talked you into buying an expensive home, and you are left with the stress of keeping up with the payments.

The same applies to peace with food. Are you going to ignore what exercise and foods are best for you, only because everyone else is on the latest workout and diet plan? When you are at a crossroad to make a decision, ask yourself WHO you are doing it for. Like a race horse with blinders on, tune out what’s going on around you and focus on what YOU want.  It isn’t always easy, but living YOUR life will be the ultimate pRiZe when reaching the finish line.  Your Lara
Take-Home Message: Regardless what everyone else is doing, do what is best for you.

Let Wisdom Do the Heavy Lifting

wisdom

There’s a saying we have in Peace with Food regarding wisdom and it is this:  Let wisdom do the heavy lifting.

Let’s face it.  There are times we don’t think too clearly.  We make rash decisions that we later regret.  It’s as if, for a few fleeting seconds, we lose our minds and when we finally come to, it’s too late.

Like the time I was so close to reaching a goal weight.  I was so close I could taste it and yet I blew it by going through the Krispy Kreme drive thru and buying a bunch of donuts.  (I’m not even going to tell you how many “a bunch” is!)  Why did I do that?!

Have you ever experienced that?  If you’re like me, too many times to count.

That is, until I learned to let wisdom do the heavy lifting.

What exactly do I mean when I say, “Let wisdom do the heavy lifting”? Basically this:  Do for yourself when you are strong what you cannot do for yourself when you are weak.

It is knowing myself, my point of weakness and temptation and then planning ahead to ensure I will come out victorious when faced with that situation.

For example, if I know that my weakness is buying chips and cookies when walking past those aisles in the grocery store, I use wisdom by making sure I avoid those aisles as much as possible.  I map out ahead of time what I am going to do in those times of temptation.  The advantage of doing this is that I use wisdom when I am strong rather than relying on my fickle willpower in the heat of the moment.  It is in these non-tempting moments that I can best plan out my escape route in moments of temptation.

So if I get tripped up by some temptation or circumstance, it is best to plan ahead when my head is clear and I feel strong.  Because like it or not, temptation is coming, but I can be prepared if I let wisdom do the heavy lifting.

Your Robynn

Take-Home Message:  Let wisdom do the heavy lifting by doing for yourself when you are strong what you cannot do when you are weak.

Peace with Myself

peace with myself

Much of my life I spent not liking myself.  I wouldn’t say that I hated myself, but there was always some aspect of myself I was trying to change. Have you ever had a remodeling project that just went on and on?  I did. My remodeling project was me!

I tried to change everything from those things that I could change to those things that I couldn’t.  (I always wished I was more funny and more articulate like some of my friends.  Those are two qualities I really admire!)  When it came to my overall peace level it was in the gutter. However, once Peace with Food came into the picture and I began living at peace, I soon realized that I could use those same principles to help me find peace with myself.

How about you?  What is your peace level with yourself?  If you were to rate yourself on a scale from 0-5 (5 being high and 0 being no peace at all) where would you fall?  Do you like yourself?  Do you accept yourself?  Do you give yourself grace, knowing that you are a work in progress?

I have learned that having peace with myself is really important because when I wasn’t at peace with myself, I wasn’t at peace with others or the world around me.

It was a process that is continuing to this day and it looked something like this:

First, I had to understand that I am a masterpiece, uniquely created, a one-of a kind.  I am Designed to be a “10”.

Secondly, I began to the process of knowing myself.  This involved taking the time to find out about my personality, strengths, weaknesses, preferences, and tendencies.

Third, once I began accepting myself as is, it was then time to begin working on my expectations of myself.  Too often my expectations were jaded and unrealistic.  At times I had an all-or-nothing mindset and other times I didn’t expect enough of myself.

I overcame these unrealistic expectations by creating Optimal Zones in my life – boundary lines that not only include giving myself grace, but also boundary lines that include realistic expectations.  This zone consists of an acceptable range – the minimum requirement – all the way up to the ideal standard.  As long as I hit the acceptable range I know I am in the ballpark.  It may not be my ideal and I may strive to do better the next time around, but I know that I at least hit the Optimal Zone.

And finally, I began to follow peace and the best way for me to follow peace was to rate my peace on a regular basis and then choose the options that gave me the greatest #peace.

Here’s the condensed version:

  1. Understand and believe that I am a masterpiece.
  2. Know myself.
  3. Begin creating realistic expectations by determining my Optimal Zones.
  4. Follow peace.

This is the path I followed to having peace with myself.  I hope it helps you in your journey to peace with yourself.

Your Robynn

 

 

Take-Home Message:  We can have peace with our self.

 

DAY 12- Week of Body Image & Scale

This week we are talking about body image and the scale. This is an important aspect of Peace with Food because what we eat impacts our appearance and the number on the scale. So how to we get peace in these areas?

For starters, we need to end the Insane CycleYou know–that crazy cycle we get on when we obsess about an area of our body or a number on the scale. We get so fixated on these things we don’t think clearly anymore! We experience extreme highs (such as finally hitting a goal weight) and then extreme lows (such as gaining all the weight back after reaching our goal weight), and then we make ourselves go on another extreme diet in hopes we’ll have a better outcome next time.

Or how about every time we look in the mirror and have feelings of disgust as we stare at areas of our bodies that we hate? This extreme focus on our physique causes us to pass up opportunities to go swimming with our kids or a double date with our friends from work. It causes us to miss out on life.with Body

There are things about a person’s body that they can control, and others that they can’t. They can lose the weight–and we’ll help them do that–but part of having peace means accepting areas of their body that may be unrealistic to change. For example, if they are always envying girls that are tall with long legs, having peace will mean letting go of the fact that they are only 5’3″.

We have always been goal-oriented people but when we finally realized–by accepting imperfections about our bodies–we could actually eliminate the daily pain of always wishing for something different.  Once we did this, we began to have more peace in our lives.

We are not saying  you need to give up on yourself or use what we say as an excuse to eat crummy. What we are saying is often times we can get so focused on something that we don’t zoom out and realize that some of the things we are chasing are either unrealistic or too big of a step for now. You will have to get rid of the All-or-Nothing mindset and be willing to tackle small, achievable, goals in order to have long-term, realistic success.

So this week, we encourage you to “zoom out”and figure out what is a realistic, bite-sized goal you can make to achieve your weight-loss success.

Posse Discussion:

1: What is one area of your body that you wish you could change?
2: What is your current level #peace in regards to your body image?  (Record date and # in your notebook)

Peace Chart2

The Peace Coaches

 

 

 

 

Click Here for Day 13!

DAY 4 – Week of Food

This week we are talking about FOOD. Yes, food! So to get started, I am going to share with you my #1 favorite and most helpful tool (a.k.a. skill) when it comes to food. I call it Don’t Waste Your Calories.

Initially you may be thinking that I’m meaning you need to count your calories and stay within a very specific calorie intake. Well, not so fast. Not wasting your calories, to me, is actually only eating foods that 1) Absolutely love OR 2)Benefit me nutritionally–that’s right, healthy foods!

You may be asking, “People only eat food they love, don’t they?” (Unless, of course, they are on a diet.)  Well that’s what I used to think! But once I started asking myself the following questions after I put something in my mouth, my perspective changed a bit: Do I really LOVE how this tastes? Do I just like it? Or am I just eating it because it is available?

Let me give you some examples of ways I used to waste my calories:
-Eating leftover food from my kids’ plates as I cleaned off the table.
-Grabbing a few cold french fries as I get up from the table at a restaurant.
-Pizza crust (I never really realized how much I don’t LOVE pizza crust!)
-Random candy I found in the house or that kids left on the counter.
-An unopened bag of chips while I was cooking dinner.
-I am not hungry, but I head to the kitchen to try to “find” something that sounds good.
-Eating food that is easily available (food that is right there), not because I actually love it.

Don't Waste Your Calories

I have actually gone so far as to spit stuff out if I taste it and realize I didn’t love it. For example, I might take a bite of a cookie and notice it is stale as soon as it hits my tongue. There is no need to consume 50 calories of a stale cookie–that would be 50 calories I could use on something I actually enjoy!–so in that instance I would usually spit it out in a napkin and throw it away. 50 calories here and there could really add up. Over the course of a month, look how many calories you could avoid simply by cutting out the foods that don’t meet your love expectations!

Obviously there will be situations where you need to eat certain foods that you may not love, such as at a dinner party when it would be rude to spit it out.  But majority of the time you have the ability to stop or throw away what you are eating if it isn’t meeting your qualifications 😉 And remember, only you can decide what your taste buds desire the most.

So there you have it! To utilize the Don’t Waste Your Calories tool, make every calorie count by either making sure you love how it tastes or it provides nutrition for your body (or adjust this tool by defining it in a way that gives you peace!).

Posse Discussion:

Part 1: Name one food item that you have been wasting your calories on because you mindlessly eat it.
Part 2: If you were to eliminate this food item, what #peace would it give you (Use Peace Chart below)? If completely eliminating this item brings no peace, what can you do that would give you peace?

Peace Chart2

Your Lara

 

 

 

Click Here for Day 5!

Time to Celebrate!

celebrate

A new beginning!  We can’t begin to tell you how excited we are for you as you set out on the Peace with Food journey because we remember WELL our new beginning.

It was April 24, 2012.

That is when we drew a line in the sand and said no more diets.  And almost three years later it is a decision we will never regret.  Life-changing.  Sounds dramatic, but it’s true.

So, are you ready for this new beginning?!  How are you going to celebrate?

Here are some suggestions to get you started:

Do something that is significant to you.  Have fun with a friend or posse.  If you prefer it more low key, just stay home, veg and do something that you enjoy.  Watch your favorite movie.  Write out your goals for the upcoming year.  Make a Live-It List (our version of a bucket list).

Do whatever speaks to you.  Robynn actually wrote out a contract and signed it.  You don’t need to do that unless you want.  (We’re including a Fresh Start Pact at the end of this post in case you are one to like writing it down!)

Dream about where you want to be a year from today.  See yourself living in peace and make a plan to take small steps daily to develop the habits and skills necessary. Remember the famous U.S. Army General George Patton’s quote:

The best plan today is better than the perfect plan tomorrow.

So don’t worry if the plan isn’t perfect.  It will unfold for you as you go.  For now, celebrate this new beginning – living a life full of peace.  Are you ready?!

Let the party (and your new life) begin!!

The Peace Coaches

 

Take-Home Message:  Celebrate your new life!

 

 

Click here for Day 1!

 

 

 

My Fresh Start Pact
Living at Peace with Food

It’s a new beginning!

On this date, ________________________________________

I, ___________________________________, am committing to a fresh start!

Today I am drawing a line in the sand and kissing diets good-bye for life!

Today I take 100% responsibility for my life.

From this day forward I will focus on #PEACE.

I will Follow Peace rather than fads, diets, or what everyone else is doing. Instead, I will find what works for me and what gives me peace.

I commit to gaining the skills that will lead to Peace with Food – skills that are transferable to all other areas of my life. I will live my best life ever – a life full of peace!

It is with excitement to begin my Peace with Food journey that I sign this pact!

Date     _____________________________________

Name ______________________________________

(You may also want to have your posse sign this pact for an extra measure of accountability.)

 

Click on the link below for the PDF Version of the Fresh Start Pact:

Peace with Food Fresh Start Pact

Show and Tell: Bite #1

As former teachers, one of the valuable lessons we learned was the power of showing vs. just telling.

So, throughout this blog not only will we tell you how to have peace, we are going to show you how we do it via video. In these videos you’ll get to take an inside look at our life – how we handle temptations, how we deal with the funk, and how we handle life in general.  From time to time we will also show you how other people are living at Peace with Food.

We hope in showing you our techniques it will help you come up with strategies of your own.  So, here goes, our first show and tell: 

To read more about the “Bite #1” tool, read here.

lara-robynn1 (1)

Take-Home Message:

Showing is more effective than just telling.

 

Peace Dare: Bite #1

Hey There!  Glad you’re with us!

PWF Testimonial: One of Robynn’s friends decided to apply Bite #1 at a Mexican restaurant she visits frequently with her family.  Before this concept, she would order a Pepsi to go with her meal.  Although it was just the first few sips that actually tasted good, she would drink the whole glass because she was thirsty and it was “there”.  However, after she heard this concept she began ordering her Pepsi, but also a water.  After three sips, when the soda no longer tasted good, she would give it to her husband and instead drink her water.

What a great way to apply this principle!

So, now it’s your turn!  Take the Peace Dare:Peace Dare Bite #1h

Have fun with it, savor your food, and experiment how each bite tastes!  If you have a buddy you can share your results with, please do!

lara-robynn1 (1)

 

 

 

 

 

Why Diets Don’t Work: Reason #10

180

Reason #10:  Peace with Food follows peace, diets a plan.

Maybe you think that following peace and not a diet sounds too good to be true.

Well, the good news is that it is TOO GOOD and best of all it is TRUE.

We are living proof.  And the cool thing is this:  Our lives have not only changed in the area of our eating and the way we view our body, but also in every other area of our life! Following peace has literally given us a 180.

Yes, Peace with Food is a 180 from diets.

So what does it mean to follow peace, you’re wondering?

Following peace simply means that you are making choices that you will not only be happy with now, but also choices you will be happy with down the road.  Peace with Food sees the now as well as the big picture.

One way we have learned to follow peace is to give our selves permission to eat the foods we love {even if these foods are considered “bad” by some}.  We know that depriving our selves of these foods is a recipe for disaster.

That doesn’t mean that we don’t set limits on the food we love. We still have to use wisdom because there is no peace in excessive weight gain and poor health.

Another way we have learned to live in peace is in choosing our physical activity.  Because Lara is not a fan of traditional exercise, she stays fit by being active around the house doing DIY projects and chasing kids.  Robynn, on the other hand, likes working out, but she doesn’t want to be tied down to a workout plan, so she constantly mixes it up with running, light weights, and workout videos.  When the weather is nice she takes it outdoors.

That’s just a sampling of what we do.  The question is, what works for you?  What choices will give you peace in the now as well as in the future?  That is the answer you are after.

That is what it means to follow peace.

lara-robynn1 (1)

 

 

Take-Home Message:

Follow peace by making choices that bring you peace not only now but in the future as well.