Peace with Food

Two Rules to Live By

| Robynn

two rules

Have you ever experienced a funk day that just wouldn’t quit?  (Hand raised right here…)

Yep, that’s right, this Peace Coach has been on an extended funk day and I’m not sure when it will subside, but am hoping real soon.

So, in the mean time, what does someone on the Peace with Food journey do when they find them self in this predicament?  For me, it’s reminding myself of the “Two Rules To Live By” poster I once saw. Rule #1: Don’t Quit and Rule #2: Refer to Rule #1.

And as I put one foot in  front of the other I keep the faith.

So there you have it.  Nothing profound. Nothing exciting.  Just outlast the funk.

Because all funks have expiration dates, but faith never expires.

Your Robynn

Stay Out of the Margin!

| Robynn

margin

Remember being in grade school and getting in trouble for writing in the margins?  I found out the hard way that there is actually a much more profound lesson to be learned from that elementary experience than I had originally thought.  And I learned that lesson the really hard way after walking in a few minutes late to the school lunchroom where my daughter was waiting for me to join her for lunch..

In tears.

Although I was just a couple minutes late,the tears were flowing down her face.

And I felt horrible.  (Not to mention this happened on the first day of her state testing.  Double whammy!)

I promised myself, then and there, that I am finally going to get serious about correcting this bad habit of living life in the margin.  Turns out the margins are there for a reason: to protect me from myself!  That’s right.  I need all the safeguards I can get.  So, I am intentionally beginning to build margins into my life.  No more trying to cram everything into the smallest amount of time possible.

Instead I’m transitioning from begin task oriented to principle oriented.  This may take me awhile to get down but I’m committed.  Time to put that elementary lesson to good use.

Keep you posted!

Your Robynn

 

Want to know my secret?

| Robynn Coates

shhhToday I’m letting you be a fly on the wall for a typical nightly routine in our household. The obvious is the nagging of the kids to clean up the living room, get ready for bed, and brush their teeth. This usually drags out for 30 minutes to an hour. Need I say, I am usually not very intentional about my time at this time of day? 😉

But after they are snug in their bed, books are read, and kisses are given, I head down the hallway to the kitchen. At this moment my holiday begins…

One frozen cookie dough ball from the freezer and one glass of milk. I carry them to the living room and set the stage.
First things first–low lighting. I turn off the lights and turn on my white Christmas lights (yes…I have them up all year round…)
I put all of my favorite pillows on the couch, grab a quilt, and I get snuggled in.
Shoot! I forgot the t.v. remote so I have to get up and do this all over again. Grr…
Ah…finally. The house is quiet, the kids are sleeping, I can feel the tingling of my legs after a hard day of work. So…relaxing…
I turn on the t.v. and take my first bite of my cookie dough. Y-U-M.
I savor every bite.

I kid you not, this event is like a broken record because I do this pretty much EVERY day. I savor this time so much because it is me time. During the day I am tempted to turn to food when I am stressed, but I remember that my event is later that night and I hold off eating because I know how much I will be able to appreciate and enjoy the food and relaxation I will give myself.

I know it sounds crazy, but if I am going to spend my calories on an indulgence, I want everything about it to be perfect. For example, I don’t want to be standing, have a full bladder, or hear a kid screaming the entire time I am eating. If so, I will be distracted, causing me to quickly or mindlessly eat! If I have to eat out of necessity in those moments, I might as well be eating something healthy because I can’t fully enjoy and savor the taste anyway.

Do you have a love-it food that you eat every day? What are your thoughts about making it an event? What would that event look like? For some, it is eating in the car while driving. For others it is enjoying popcorn at the movies. What is yours???

Your Lara

Let Wisdom Do the Heavy Lifting

| Robynn Coates

wisdom

There’s a saying we have in Peace with Food regarding wisdom and it is this:  Let wisdom do the heavy lifting.

Let’s face it.  There are times we don’t think too clearly.  We make rash decisions that we later regret.  It’s as if, for a few fleeting seconds, we lose our minds and when we finally come to, it’s too late.

Like the time I was so close to reaching a goal weight.  I was so close I could taste it and yet I blew it by going through the Krispy Kreme drive thru and buying a bunch of donuts.  (I’m not even going to tell you how many “a bunch” is!)  Why did I do that?!

Have you ever experienced that?  If you’re like me, too many times to count.

That is, until I learned to let wisdom do the heavy lifting.

What exactly do I mean when I say, “Let wisdom do the heavy lifting”? Basically this:  Do for yourself when you are strong what you cannot do for yourself when you are weak.

It is knowing myself, my point of weakness and temptation and then planning ahead to ensure I will come out victorious when faced with that situation.

For example, if I know that my weakness is buying chips and cookies when walking past those aisles in the grocery store, I use wisdom by making sure I avoid those aisles as much as possible.  I map out ahead of time what I am going to do in those times of temptation.  The advantage of doing this is that I use wisdom when I am strong rather than relying on my fickle willpower in the heat of the moment.  It is in these non-tempting moments that I can best plan out my escape route in moments of temptation.

So if I get tripped up by some temptation or circumstance, it is best to plan ahead when my head is clear and I feel strong.  Because like it or not, temptation is coming, but I can be prepared if I let wisdom do the heavy lifting.

Your Robynn

Take-Home Message:  Let wisdom do the heavy lifting by doing for yourself when you are strong what you cannot do when you are weak.

Optimal Zone

| Robynn Coates

optimal zone

On our Peace with Food journey we have had many “Aha” moments, to be sure, and this is definitely one of them.  We call it our Optimal Zone epiphany.  This revelation has totally changed the way we approach goal setting, along with the expectations we place on people, circumstances, and ourselves.

Before PWF we were really all-or-nothing type of gals.  We saw only one way of doing things and there was only ONE right answer.  Never two, and for sure not three or four.  But on our PWF journey we slowly began to learn that this mindset only stole our peace.  We were setting our goals high.  Really, really high and rarely ever achieving those goals.  The result:  Frustration with a capital “F”.

What did we need?  Not a new goal, just a new perspective.

Enter the Optimal Zone.

The Optimal Zone is basically a zone that includes your acceptable level of satisfaction, in any area of life, all the way up to your ideal level of satisfaction in that area.  If you applied the Optimal Zone to your weight, instead of just choosing one number that is ideal, you would include a range, say 125-132.  Sure, 125 lbs. may be your dream weight, but surely there is a zone where you feel good, even if it isn’t your ideal.  Having an Optimal Zone allows you to experience victory, even if you don’t hit the mark perfectly each time.

Determining our Optimal Zone has helped ground us even when things don’t go perfectly.  It takes off the pressure and let’s us focus on living, not trying to live up to a certain standard that just so happens to be impossible to reach on a consistent basis.

A bonus of the Optimal Zone is that it is relevant to every area of our lives.  We all have expectations, many of those are unrealistic.  Whether it be in relationships, our job, our finances, you name it.  When you determine your Optimal Zone in each area you can then give yourself and others a break and enjoy the ride instead of being stressed by it.

Go ahead and set your goals high, but then have an acceptable range.  Maybe reading to your child for 30 minutes every day isn’t always possible, but reading a story to them and tucking them in to bed might be more attainable day in and day out.

Assess your expectations, especially the ones where you feel disappointed or discouraged and determine what the Optimal Zone might be for each of them.  We think that when you begin to live in these zones, you’ll be pleasantly surprised to see that the pressure level goes down and the enjoyment and peace level goes up.

The Peace Coaches

 

 

 

 

Take-Home Message:  Create Optimal Zones in your life by defining the acceptable level in each area all the way up to the ideal level.